|This was one day about a year ago when they were bored in their room.|
I spend my days saying to myself, "WHY??". Why can't they learn? Why don't they listen? Why don't they obey? Why don't they desire to make better choices? WHY?
I have gone to bed every night for the last week trying to brainstorm how to make my days better, easier, more enjoyable while they are at home together all day every day for the next 90 days. I pray for wisdom and creativity and endurance and sweet words to flow from my mouth. I pray for new perspective and outlook. I read books about loving unconditionally and how to live life to the fullest right before I fall asleep. And approximately 10 minutes after I put my feet on the floor in the morning I am spewing and threatening and yelling and well, feeling exasperated.
As I was cleaning this morning and had moved one unnamed 4-year-old-boy to 3 different time out locations, I thought, 'isn't that how our Father God feels about us'? Exasperated? Wondering every day: Why can't they learn? Why don't they listen? Why don't they obey? Why don't they desire to make better choices?
Fortunately for us He is God and He has infinite amounts of grace and even when exasperated He can still offer grace and love and give us another chance. I, however am human. A visual I have had lately is of God living in me and giving me power that I would not have otherwise. Almost like a super-hero. Visualize haggard mom with a big 'HS' for Holy Spirt on her shirt. The holy spirit is in me and can make me more like Jesus every minute of every day. He can give me the ability to love these boys well despite their sinfulness.
God give me the POWER to have your super human powered grace exude from my person every minute of every day!! Those boys need it. And Lord forgive me for every time I open my mouth and spew nastiness to these boys today. Amen.
Anyone have advice for structure, creativity, and large amounts of patience? Anyone else going through this yet or anticipating it as summer begins?